


Aftershocks

by fuzipenguin



Series: Well Kept [4]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, BDSM, Dom/sub, Established Relationship, M/M, Other, Twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2018-03-20
Packaged: 2018-04-19 16:32:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4753253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuzipenguin/pseuds/fuzipenguin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sideswipe has distanced himself from his brother, and Sunstreaker can't stand it any longer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sleeping Arrangements

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bibliotecaria-d asked Meme: extension on Sunstreaker's attempts to get Sideswipe to 'go back to normal' in "Aftershocks." =D

             “What are you doing?”

             Sideswipe onlined his optics with a start and stared up at Sunstreaker. “Huh?”

             Sunstreaker wordlessly gestured to his twin and their berth. 

             His brother dropped his gaze to the bed, blinked, and then looked back up. “Uh… recharging?”

             “You’re on my side,” Sunstreaker stated, crossing his arms over his chest. 

             Sideswipe raised an orbital ridge but didn’t budge an inch from where he was lying on his hip, back pressed against the wall. The expanse of berth available to Sunstreaker seemed huge, especially as Sideswipe was prone to sprawling across the entire surface. Now Sunstreaker could lie down on his back with inches to spare on either side of him. If he wanted to. Strangely, the idea didn’t appeal to him at all. 

            “Since when do we have sides?”

            “Since always!” Sunstreaker exclaimed throwing his hands into the air. “You’ve always been on the outside.”

            Sideswipe furrowed his brow in thought. “I guess I never noticed,” he said with a shrug that was just a shade too nonchalant. “Does it really matter?”

            Sunstreaker bit his glossa. Literally bit it hard enough to taste energon in his mouth. He supposed he was lucky Sideswipe still recharged with him at all, considering how skittish he’d been over the past few days. He’d been giving Sunstreaker space, the opportunity to escape from any situation, and while Sunstreaker appreciated it, it was completely unnecessary. 

            But Sideswipe felt it was, so Sunstreaker let it lie. 

            “No. No, it doesn’t matter,” Sunstreaker sighed, climbing into bed. He laid down in the very center of the area allotted to him and mourned the empty inches between his and his brother’s frame. 

 

~ End Chapter 1


	2. Breakdown

                “Damn it, Sides, would you just  _look_  at me?” Sunstreaker demanded, shoving his twin hard enough that Sideswipe’s back impacted against the wall. Sideswipe let himself be pushed, not retaliating in the slightest although his coiled tight frame and roiling energy field said something else entirely.

                “I  _am_  looking at you!” Sideswipe replied hotly. 

                And instead of dropping his optics to Sunstreaker’s shoulder or staring off into the distance like he had done ever since That Day over a month ago, Sideswipe  _was_  looking back. With a gaze of badly hid guilt and misery.

                Sunstreaker had no idea how to handle it anymore. He’d tried giving his brother time, tried talking to him, even letting Sideswipe ‘face him as proof of Sunstreaker’s trust. But the words went in one audial and out the other, and somehow Sideswipe kept managing to be the one on the bottom.

                Sunstreaker couldn’t ever think of a time when the two of them had been on such uneven ground before. Sideswipe wasn’t  _quite_  treating Sunstreaker like glass, but Sideswipe  _was_  treading carefully during every physical encounter between the two of them… from the sparring ring to the berth. It was frustrating and maddening, and Sunstreaker didn’t know what else to do to help his twin.

                And they were out of time. Sunstreaker was the one who needed help now.

                “I love you,” Sunstreaker stated firmly for about the hundredth time since their last session. “I trust you. Completely. And I  _need_ you.”

                “I’m right here,” Sideswipe protested, weakly throwing his arms out to the side.

                Sunstreaker shook his head. “No, you’re not. At least not the part of you I need right now.”

                A flash of fear crossed Sideswipe’s face, and he shook his head rapidly. “No. I can’t.”

                “Sideswipe…” Sunstreaker trailed off, dropping his hands from his twin’s shoulders. “I’m…”

                “You’re fine!” Sideswipe insisted, a little hysterically. “You just had a physical from Ratchet two days ago, and your paint job is gorgeous. You’re fine!”

                “You know that’s not true. I was only there for a physical because I stupidly challenged Grimlock. My paint job only looks good because I had to redo it after he fragged me up. I am  _not_  fine. My head’s a mess.”

                Sideswipe shook his head again, crossing his arms across his chest, hands now curled into fists. “You always get into scraps.”

                “Not in a long while. Sideswipe, I need you to bring me down. You said that I was to always come to you. And I’ve tried putting it off, but I keep getting worse,” Sunstreaker explained, his voice cracking on the last word.  

                Two weeks ago, he could respect Sideswipe’s need for space. Not any longer. Not when Sunstreaker was being consumed with random and worsening bouts of rage and depression. His hands had a slight tremble, and he was beginning to doubt his effectiveness on the battlefield; he certainly should have lasted longer against Grimlock than he had.

                He’d even considered all his old avenues of escapism but now that he had experienced the subspaces Sideswipe could elicit in him, those former tricks all paled in comparison. He needed his brother, and he needed a session. Badly.

                “Oh, Primus, Sunny,” Sideswipe whispered miserably. “What if I hurt you again?”

                “That’s kinda the point, Sides. Or don’t. Order me around, take me to task, I don’t care how you do it, but just do it!” Sunstreaker exclaimed.

                Sideswipe stared at him for several moments before finally shaking his head. “We’ll try something else.”

                If Sunstreaker had heard confidence in his brother’s voice, he would have stopped, maybe given him another day or so and then asked again. And again, and again, as often as it took. But Sideswipe sounded uncertain, his energy field wavering. So Sunstreaker refused to stop pushing.  

                “Sir, please,” Sunstreaker begged quietly.

                Sideswipe sucked in a ventilation and looked at him with wide optics, expression torn.

                Sunstreaker pressed his advantage, slowly lowering himself to his knees, gazed fixed on his twin’s face.

                “Please, sir. Please tell me what to do. Please hurt me, or pleasure me, or let me pleasure you… anything you’d like. Just…  _please_.”

                “Don’t… don’t do that…” Sideswipe pleaded, reaching for him and then yanking his hands away as if touching Sunstreaker would completely crush Sideswipe’s resolve.

                “I need you, sir. I need you so much. Please,” Sunstreaker murmured, sagging in place. His optics dropped to his brother’s pedes, and he reached out to touch them reverently, lowering himself so that his bumper brushed the floor.

                “Please, sir. Please. Please. Please,” Sunstreaker chanted, trembling so badly his armor rattled atop his frame. “I’ll do anything. Please.”

                He pressed his parted lips against the top of Sideswipe’s left foot, ex-venting shakily against the white plating. Sunstreaker didn’t know what else to say or do, so he continued to whisper pleading entreaties, getting more and more desperate by the second.

                A tiny part of him was a little appalled by his behavior, but the majority of him could have cared less. It hadn’t taken long for Sunstreaker to realize just how much Sideswipe had been grounding him all this time. It wasn’t only the sessions; it was also the reassuring touches, the nudges, the challenging stares. All daily things Sideswipe had backed off from doing after their disastrous session that wasn’t.

                All things Sunstreaker had found himself craving as he floundered through his days without direction.

                Suddenly a hand landed on his helm and he startled, jerking partially upright and staring at the mech above him.

                Sideswipe’s optics met his own, and Sunstreaker’s spark leapt into his throat at the sight of his brother’s gaze. It was still haunted, and would probably be so for some time until Sideswipe came to terms with his own guilt. Nevertheless, that stare was also unwavering and confident. Even now, Sunstreaker could practically see that familiar mantle of control descending onto Sideswipe’s shoulders.

                Sunstreaker shook with anticipation, a hungry noise bubbling up in the back of his intake.

                The hand slid down the side of Sunstreaker’s face to cup his cheek. Sideswipe crouched, Sunstreaker’s hands slipping off his brother’s pedes and flattening against the floor. His ventilations stalled as he waited for Sideswipe to speak.

                “We’ll be seeing how well you take orders today. No extreme pain. A little pleasure if you do well,” Sideswipe recited. “Does that sound good?”

                Sunstreaker could have sobbed with relief. Instead he nodded rapidly, awaiting his first order. “Yes, please. Thank you, Sideswipe.”

                “I’m glad you agree, and you’re welcome. The session will begin now. Assume first pose,” Sideswipe commanded, giving Sunstreaker’s cheek one final caress before he stood.

                Sunstreaker immediately straightened on his knees, pulling his arms behind his back, and clasping his forearms with his opposite servos. He quickly looked up at his twin, ever attentive for the next demand. After obeying just this one simple instruction, Sunstreaker was already begin to settle, his mind quieting into that static-filled haze he had been longing for.  

                “Optics to the front,” Sideswipe called out, clasping his own hands behind his back. He began circling Sunstreaker, steps slow and steady, until he stood directly behind him, so close Sunstreaker’s back warmed from the proximity.

                “Oh, and Sunstreaker?”

                “Yes, sir?” Sunstreaker asked, optics fixed on the wall directly across from him. Nothing but a Decepticon invasion would be able to get him to look away. Not unless Sideswipe ordered it, of course.

                “Your safeword, should you choose to use it…” Sideswipe murmured, bending over and nuzzling Sunstreaker’s nearest audial. “…is hyacinth.”

 

~ End 

               

               

**Author's Note:**

> The interwebs tells me purple hyacinth in a bouquet is meant as a request for forgiveness. Sunny has already forgiven his brother ten times over, but Sideswipe's going to keep asking because he needs to hear it. 
> 
>  
> 
> In case you haven't noticed, Sides and Sunny's safewords are always flowers and Jazz and Optimus' are always city names. A meaningless thing, but I like to be consistent :)


End file.
